There are 24 Sections in this exercise. Below is a list of the Sections and a summary regarding each of the Sections. The number of questions vary from section to section. And for the record, there are over 365 questions in all. Please be assured that if you ask and answer at least 365 questions over the course of a year about yourself or your partner, you will be, no doubt, more knowledgeable about yourself and your partner than you were before starting this exercise!
The questions are in no particular order but each question does have a unique, identifying number so that if there is a question about any of the questions, they can be easily identified.
Remember that these lists are not exhaustive or all-inclusive lists of questions. If you have questions that are not noted to be on the list, please feel free to submit them for consideration. As suggestions come in for additional sections, they will be considered for being added when a sufficient number of questions for a new section has been submitted.
Our members get priority on having their questions and suggestions reviewed for submission. Members will also be notified when there are new questions or sections that have been added or updated.
Sections
- Personal
- Family
- Career
- Education
- Personal Preferences
- Favorites
- Religion/Spiritual
- Moral/Ethical/Legal
- Entertainment/Fun
- Domestic
- Financial
- Travel/Vacationing
- Inspiration
- General
- Relationships/Marriage
- Politics/World Civics
- Social Media (SM)
- Sexual Identity
- Fertility/Reproduction
- IT/Internet/Computer
- Race/Prejudice
- Global Impact/Issues
- The 5 Love Languages*
- Deal Breakers
Section Summary
- Personal
These are general questions that are directed at getting to know yourself and your partner in the most basic and personal way possible. No really difficult questions, but likely many things you already know about yourself and your partner. But it’s always good to make sure and assume nothing.
- Family
These questions are intended to help you to get to know your partner’s family. This can be a rather sensitive topic, especially if you or your partner are estranged from your respective families or if your family history is questionable or unknown. Please be very understanding when asking these questions.
- Career/Profession
These questions relate to your current career or the career or profession that you are working towards. This will also include questions about your work history and your goals and aspirations regarding your desired or dream job or profession.
- Education
These questions are intended to share with your partner your educational history and aspirations. Please understand that it is not a game where the goal is to determine which person has higher educational aspirations, but rather, to share with each other what your current and possible future educational goals are. And please remember that everyone is not cut out to go to college or graduate school. Please be respectful of each other’s educational goals and aspirations (or lack thereof).
- Personal Preferences
These are rather fun and straightforward questions regarding personal preferences, whether you prefer A, or B, both, or neither. You or your partner may have no particular feelings one way or another regarding the listed options, and this is totally acceptable. The goal is to find out which preferences you do have in common. This may come in handy when planning future trips, activities or in going out for a date.
- Favorites
These questions are intended to help you determine what your partner’s favorite things are. Answers to these questions will help around special days such as birthdays, celebrated holidays and, of course, just because!
- Religion/Spiritual
While many people may not have any particular religious or spiritual inclinations, it is very important to know if you or your partner does have strongly held beliefs or practices. These questions are meant to be a means to bring the topic up, especially if there are specific practices or beliefs that may may be of importance to one of you or may well be deal-breakers. It is far better to learn of this earlier rather than later in the relationship. These questions are NOT meant to get someone to change their beliefs, but rather, to gain an understanding of their partner’s personal beliefs and practices.
- Moral/Ethical/Legal
It is easy to think that we know where we stand with regards to moral, ethical and legal issues, but unless questioned on such topics, many people have a tendency to keep these topics very close to their heart. In addition, some people never even think to bring such topics up or may be afraid to either ask or answer such questions. Again, please tread carefully and respectfully when reviewing these questions. They are not meant to divide, insult or demean but rather, to build trust with each other.
- Entertainment/Fun
Everyone wants to have fun. And these are the fun questions. This list is not an exclusive list and is not meant to be. It is intended to help you find out what pleasures, activities and pastimes you both share or wish to make a part of your relationship. Please have fun with this section and if you feel that we have left some activities out that should be added to the list, by all means, please feel free to submit suggestions to us for review. This section is a living and growing set of question. Please help keep it alive. Also, please note that there is a Travel and Vacationing section (Section 12) as well, thus, if you do not see certain questions here, they will likely be addressed in that section. This website is not intended to give advice, but the one thing that the creators of this project recommends is that you make it a habit to take time for you and your partner to do something fun each and every week. It doesn’t need to cost money or be extravagant. It could be something as simple as taking a walk together or having dinner out on the patio or as a picnic. The important thing is to remember to always keep fun as an integral part of your relationship.
- Domestic
Home, Sweet Home! What constitutes a Sweet Home to you? To your partner? What are your must haves? What are you intolerant to? What do you feel your partner must be aware of as it relates to domestic issues and duties? These are a few questions to consider. If you can think of other questions that should have been included, please feel free to forward them to us for consideration.
- Financial
It is a well known fact that one of the greatest strains on a relationship is so often related to finances. These questions are not meant to make or break a relationship. Instead, they are intended to allow you and your partner to ask some frank and straightforward questions about how you manage your finances and how they would be expected to be managed in the relationship. These are not difficult questions or trick questions. Unfortunately, many of these questions are never brought up in a relationship, neither early nor later on as time passes. Of all the areas of any relationship, there should never be any unwritten rules regarding finances. These areas should be very clearly and definitively delineated at some point in the relationship, and the earlier, the better.
- Travel/Vacationing
Ah! More fun questions. It is very likely that one or both partners will have a full-time or part-time job or be in school full-time or part-time. It is of utmost importance that you take time to treat yourselves. This does not mean that you have to spend a large amount of money on taking time off nor does it mean that you must travel half-way around the world to have a good time together. Use these questions to find out what goals you have in common when it comes to taking time off. And please do not let these questions go unaddressed or allow your answers to go unheeded. Please make it a point to remember the very specific things that appeals to your partner. Plan time off, save up for time to get away. Make it a habit and part of your budget and get used to looking forward to time off together. This is very important for all relationships.
- Inspiration
What issues, topics or subjects inspire you? Who inspires you? These questions are meant to help you learn about yourself as well as your partner. They are also are meant to help you be an inspiration to each other and others around you.
- General
These were questions that just didn’t amount to enough to make a separate section. As new questions and more sections are added, these questions may find a place in their own section. But for now, they are all thrown together in this section.
- Relationships/Marriage
While there are only a few questions in this section, many relationship questions are contained within other sections in one form or another. These are the ones that deserved their own section. These specific questions have been included so as to cover as many bases as possible and leave as little to chance as possible.
- Politics (Local/National/International)/World Civics
As you may be aware, this exercise has been created with a heavy influence by the North American region. But not all people engaging in this exercise will be from said region. It would not be wise to avoid taking international concerns and issues into consideration as part of your relationship. This also applies to Section 22, Global Impact/Issues. This exercise is not meant to be North American ethnocentric when approaching these questions but it does wish to be inclusive in helping you learn of each other’s civic concerns, goals and interests. While there are only a few questions in these section, please help this exercise be more applicable to others and be more inclusive by submitting questions that you may think of regarding local, national and international civic issues by submitting your questions that you feel may be appropriate for this exercise.
- Social Media (SM)
Love it or hate it, social media is not going away anytime soon. And everyone has an opinion regarding it. Social media is not being presented in any sort of good or bad light, but rather, it is being presented so that you and your partner may know where you stand on the topic.
- Sexual Identity
Sexual identity has been an issue for centuries and centuries. But it has not been the most open and commonly discussed topic in public, in school, at work, or at church. Currently, it has become such a hot subject that it has been made the topic of legislation. It has been discussed nowadays to the point of inciting division, stirring up anger, causing emotional distress and causing ruin to families and friendships. People have been emotionally and physically hurt, have lost their job and lost income and have been ostracized over this issue. While many people have very strong feelings one way or the other regarding sexual identity, this is one topic that is not going away anytime soon. There are many sections in this exercise that members will place a low priority on. Please think twice before discounting the importance of this subject and the implications that it may have on your relationship, your family, your friends and associates, your neighbors, your service providers and your children (should you decide to have children).
- Fertility/Reproduction
Whether or not you intend to or are able to have children, this is another topic that tends to be overlooked and side-stepped in relationships. In addition, this is a topic that can unknowingly be a deal-breaker in a relationship. Relationships have ended due to differences in preferences in having (or not having) children as well as the inability to have children. This topic is not to be taken lightly. These are questions that must be addressed if there is any intent to have (or not have) children, if you are participating in behaviors and activities that would put you (either partner) at risk of prematurely or unexpectedly becoming a parent or if there is any possibility that the ability/capacity to conceive on either partner’s part would be brought into question.
- IT/Internet/Computer
They are a normal part of life, for better or for worse. We can use this technology to help or to hurt, to save time or to waste time, to earn money or lose money. Some of us are required to use it for our jobs. Some people are addicted to it and use it as a surrogate for proper relationships. Please, be aware of where you and your partner stand on this technology. This includes the use of desktop or laptop computers, tablets, cellphones, computer games, virtual reality, robotics and high-tech (or low-tech) computerized gadgets and accessories. And please keep in mind that this exercise would not be possible without the use of computer technology.
- Race/Prejudice
Despite what people may think, this is still as prevalent as it was centuries ago. In fact, it is more prominent today than ever and exists in so many forms. While it is infrequently obvious, many people have learned to be very clandestine about their ill-feelings towards those different from them. It remains a difficult topic to discuss in private as well as public. Please take the time to review these few, simple questions and please approach these questions with an earnest and open heart.
- Global Impact/Issues
As noted in Section 16 [Politics (Local/National/International)/World Civics], this exercise has been created with a lean towards a North American influence. This is not to tie or isolate the questions to any specific geographical area. There is a plan to add sections to this exercise that are specific for different subjects and topics, such as specific geographic regions, religions, cultures, sects and even different generations and demographics (children, grandparents, married couples, people who have become single for whatever reason) in addition to people dealing with very specific issues such as certain illnesses or conditions that have lots of answered and unanswered questions. This section is intended to address global issues and learn where you and your partner stand on such issues.
- The 5 Love Languages*
If you are familiar with this concept, then you will have no problems in reviewing these questions. While The 5 Love Languages* (not a sponsor of this website [yet]) is based on a book written by Gary Chapman , it is to be understood that the views and opinions of this exercise are independent of those expressed in this book and that the Love Language Brand in no way supports or promotes this exercise nor have any financial ties to it. It is included because it contains a significant amount of information that many people have found to be very helpful in getting to know themselves as they relate to others, including one’s partner. If you are familiar with this topic or do not feel that these questions would be of any value to you, then please feel free to quickly review this section and move on to another section. Please note that with the book being mentioned, the website for the book is listed here (5 Love Languages*) and at the end of Section 23.
Please note that if you have ideas or suggestions for other relationship-type books, exercises, websites or content that you feel has been helpful in building up your relationship, please feel free to forward this information to us for review and to include in our (not yet completed but under construction) “Helpful Links” section that is part of your membership.
- Deal Breakers
Though this section is the last section, it may well carry the most weight of all the sections. In fact, it is worth stating that if you go to this section first or chose to address this section very early in your relationship, you may find that you and your partner may choose not to stay together for whatever reason. While we will not be our intended outcome of your relationship, we will feel that the exercise was instrumental in helping you come to this decision well before entering into a relationship that may have been doomed from the start. While some may feel that this part of the exercise is being rather negative and may be sabotaging the relationship, nothing could be further from the truth.
How many times have you heard yourself or someone else say those paralyzing words “if I had only known this before now?”. And also understand that the questions in this section are by far NOT the only deal-breaker questions. There may be specific issues that you (or your partner) are very aware of that your partner (or you) are totally ignorant of that will make or break your relationship. It is so important to share these issues with your partner. This is to be taken very seriously.
There may also be issues that you may have that you may feel are deal-breakers for your partner but you don’t want to make them aware of it (at least before you commit to a long-term relationship) because it may “break up” the relationship. Should one choose to continue in the relationship while keeping this information to yourself, there is no assurance that it will not be a deal-breaker once the other partner is made aware of this information. Deal-breakers are important and they are not to be taken lightly. If you believe that an issue exists in your relationship that truly is a deal-breaker, then you owe it to yourself and your partner to discuss this with them at length and the sooner, the better.
Deal-breakers are also important because it allows one to make it very clear what the limitations and boundaries are to be respected in the relationship. It is important to know which lines are NOT to be crossed. It should be very clear as to what the consequences are if a deal-breaker situation occurs. Such situations are conditions upon which a trusting relationship is built. It is important to know that if a deal-breaker situation occurs, then a trust is broken and that trust may never be restored. Again, deal-breakers are a way of saying that if you break this trust, it is a breach of trust that may never be restored. This needs to be very clear and very explicit in each and every relationship. While there may not be many deal-breakers in a relationship, it is very important to know that it only takes breaking a trust ONE time for the relationship to be permanently undermined.
Please take this section very seriously and take the knowledge learned from these questions to heart. Honor the things learned from these questions as if your relationship depends on it (because it does!).
Please remember, if you do not ask, you may never know.
*The 5 Love Languages is copyrighted by © 2024 Love Language Brand. All Rights Reserved.